BOY or GIRL? Even before we got pregnant, my husband and I decided that we wanted to be surprised. I had a moment of weakness while I was trying to register, but that quickly passed. The wonder of not knowing kept me going. I couldn’t wait to hear the Dr. say “it’s a BOY or it’s a GIRL” and have my little bundle of joy placed in my arms for the first time. Well, I never got that chance. I went in the hospital on Friday night to be induced because I had slight signs of preeclampsia and since I was so close to my due date my Dr. wanted to be safe rather than sorry. Although I wanted to have my baby as NATURAL as possible, I knew it was best to listen to my doctor.
As soon as I was hooked up to the blood pressure monitor I knew something was wrong. The induction would NOT be happening. My blood-pressure had spiked to 177 over 107. Before I knew it my husband was on the phone with our parents, and I was signing consent forms for an emergency C-section. Let me be honest. My “birth-plan” NEVER even entered my mind. The ONLY thing I was thinking was that I wanted my baby out safely and in my arms.
As they were preparing me for surgery the doctor informed me that I would not be able to get a spinal tap (due to my blood pressure being so high) I would have to be put completely under. Like I said, at the time I was only thinking about my baby. It wasn’t until after I was done with my SECOND emergency surgery (complications from the first meant I had to go back under and have another surgery) that I realized I didn’t know if I had a boy or girl. I knew my baby was healthy, and my husband had told me as soon as I came out of the first surgery that we had a beautiful girl, I even got to hold her in between the two surgeries. The problem was, I was too drugged up to remember. In fact, I was so drugged up I barely got to hold her for the first 24 hours of her life, and because of the drugs I was on I couldn’t breastfeed her like I had “planned”.
I was so sad her first night, I had to have her sleep in the nursery because my husband had been up for over 48 hours straight and I was so drugged up I didn’t feel safe having her in the room with us. I cried myself to sleep that night feeling so upset that I “missed” my baby’s birth. The next morning shed A LOT of light. The nurse brought in my girl and even though I was still heavily medicated it wasn’t anything like the night before. I got to truly meet my beautiful baby girl for the first time, and nothing else mattered.
Birth plans are important and I still believe every women should have an idea of what she wants, but now I tell every mom to be that I talk to that my delivery was the furthest thing from my birth plan, and ya know what? That’s O.K.